All of my life, I've sort of been known as the "good girl." I've never really done drugs, drinking or partying and I've always been sort of a people pleaser. I was the nerdy valedictorian of my high school and my social life was virtually nonexistent aside from church and the occasional youth hangout. A couple of years ago, I began to worry that maybe I had been missing out on life. A guy who appeared to show interest in dating me actually stopped talking to me when he found out I was a virgin and that I believed in waiting until marriage before doing that sort of thing. He even made fun of me for it and said I must be a prick or something. Although I was 20, I began to wonder if maybe I was missing out on something- I wondered, was that guy right?
I decided to talk to my pastor and his wife about it. I told them of my concerns and that I kind of felt like a loser because I was so inexperienced. I told them of how I was the only one in my group of friends that was a virgin and that I worried if something must be wrong with me. Then my pastor's wife told me something I'll never forget. "In a moment you can do those things and be just like them, but never- not in a whole lifetime- could they ever be like you again."
Right then it clicked. Why was I so worried about fitting in with everyone else? I was so focused on what other people thought of me, it didn't even cross my mind that maybe it was okay to be a "good girl". Society and the media push this cookie cutter "cool kid" mold so much that young people are actually starting to think it's a bad thing to be a virgin after the age of 16- does that not seem a little messed up?? Kids are even beginning to experiment with sex in elementary school- a sad thing indeed.
God is calling us to a higher sandard than the world around us, though. The people around us will know who we serve by our actions. If they see us living a pure life, they will see Christ in us. And if nothing else, God blesses us for our purity.
"Blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God." (Matthew 5:8)
Innocence is nothing to be ashamed of- in this day and age it is actually something to be admired in a young adult. The lines have been blurred when it comes to what is considered "sex" in the the eyes of the world. But you must ask yourself "does this bring glory to God? Am I being a witness?" Though the world plays it off like it's not a big deal, sex is a very big deal. It's something that once it's done, it can never be undone- ever.
But if you have done things that you are not proud of, don't worry that hope is lost; you need to realize that you can change. In Christ, you are a new creation.
"Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come!" (2 Corinthians 5:17)
The slate is wiped clean and you get a second chance in Christ. God can restore you even if you've already made a mistake.
You are special and God created you for a special reason. Sex is something that should be saved for marriage- it is something that should be for those who are committed for life. Why give something so important to just anybody?
So don't be ashamed. Don't feel inexperienced or left out. God loves you and has reserved someone special for you. There's no need to be in such a rush- I promise you won't regret waiting until your wedding night and saving something so important for someone who loved you enough to wait.
And remember: in just a moment you can be like everybody else, but they can NEVER be like you again no matter how hard they tried.